Winter Cup Of Ice Cold Water

Winter backdrop

And I feel ice cold

Filled and almost overflowing

No warmth

Scene on a mountain side

Wind shredding emotions I can’t hide

Praying my actions far from disguised backside

//

It’s cold

Quiet and loud at the same time

Bitter winds and a dry heat in my mind

Ice cubes but sweat silent landmines

Stirred and shaken guts

And I’m thirsty for change but feel frozen

Oh Lord Jesus it’s cold

//

Wires torn and I feel broken

Wish my tongue would disconnect

Writing my only breakthrough

After prayer and tears

Asking why ice cubes clang in my ears

Where am I

Where I am

Is cold

//-//

Indifferent

Selfish

Wasteful

Insignificant trivial

It isn’t true but these days are colored blue I’m apologizing to God for wasting his time

Struggling with self-control how can I think breathing is acceptable the enemy opens fire

God loves me because he loves me doesn’t change his reasons at 5 am rolling his eyes saying never mind

I see flaws and faults in my selections God I feel like a faulty building a renter swears is just fine

Gotta keep asking what’s wrong with me is sanctification into triple overtime?!

It’s cold.

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