Prayerful Against Ego

Followed by chatter everywhere in my voice

When I ignore it self screams praise rejoice

Negative talk festers bad endings a bad choice

Depression asks too much with every invoice

Doesn’t matter because that’s the deal

Screw me over until I’m too numb to feel

Peel all hope away leaving a tainted zeal

End my own life to become a meal

Underground for worms death casket and fate sealed

Swallowed by lies broadcasted non-stop

They fight to hold my attention calls never dropped

Make me feel dirty untouchable with any mop

Make my penis hard when imagining a self-inflicted gunshot

Drunk

High

I never can fly because I’m tangled in imaginary events hog-tied

Barbed wire inside must be careful

Amused holy folks laugh swearing I should be more prayerful

One, they say seek one.


Fists punching fists my programming resistant

Hating all I am powerfully with persistence

Head hurting many battles much insistence

Gotta stay awake plus find meaning subsistence

Sleeping awake like payable on death

Self-deception hard at work so not a lot of rest

Exhaling depression slowly via each breath

Guess I’ll keep going until one has nothing left

Fighting with everything I have this is everything

Loosing means suicide so I’m getting harder with these swings

Heard a crown and ten rings I’ll endure these painful stings

Well okay

Better than starting over salvation delayed

Shaking my head as a baby dismayed

Enemy passenger gleefully awaiting my defeat

I get back up Agent Smith can’t understand why I won’t cease

An animal I’ll rip the unseen enemy break leash

Shit I write for my spirit’s playlist stay on beat

Hell I can’t stop speaking it’s something else I’m backseat

When I say I quit dam breaks words and ideas leak

Feeding spirits with meat and milk to wash it down

Deleting any virus in the system can’t hide in the cloud

Seek one, the say only one.


I have met the enemy and he won’t shut up

Behind my back eavesdropping running amuck

Debris in the eye fighting defeat tossed plucked

Seen a glimpse of redemption my dream

Giving in to the inner loser means bitter screams

Nothing is ever what it appears or seems

Tell that to the misguided performer lies deemed truth

Can’t raise my hands joyfully to a roof

Ask for evidence all it has are lies or emotions as proof

Expose this bastard spitting ramblings I’m armed at any booth

Meanwhile the imposter can’t kill this sleuth

While others stay busy with labels for divine talk

I’m learning how to live correctly spiritual babies crawl then walk

Cleaning the inside of this strange cup preparing drink

When I pour into your receptive mind let it sink

Past flesh and blood the secret brink

Over the edge loosing I to find to us.

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